Kelly Ramey, of Missouri, claims to have found Jesus in a bag of Cheetos. Many potheads have already done that, but whatever.

Ramey says when she opened the bag of cheesy goodness, she felt something unusual…and pulled out Cheesus, which is what Kelly and her husband have named the Cheeto. (Is that blasphemous? Seriously? Cheesus?)

Ramey doesn’t plan to sell the Cheeto and will put it in a safe deposit box or on display so people can enjoy it.

Call me a cynic, but that thing doesn’t look like Jesus. You could argue that it looks lilke a utility pole, a lowercase “t”, or SATAN! Sure, I know that God reveals himself in mysterious ways and all, but I gotta think he’s got better things to do than put a likeness of Jesus in a bag of MSG-laden snack foods.

Anyhoo, there’s video below. I take no responsibility for the quality. I’m pretty sure where you hear defeaning silence, you should hear reporter track, but what do you want? It’s not like they’re CNN. Also, you’ll get to see the Cheesus lover herself talk about her miraculous find, PLUS a local preacher talking about how wonderful it is. Nope, not kidding.